Daycare - To Spare Their Feelings or Not (the teachers that is)

So the dilemma of switching our son to a new daycare has passed. It was difficult at first because we didn't want to hurt the feelings of the ones that have kept him since he was three months old. In the grand scheme of things, we shouldn't have even considered those folks at all and only thought of our son. We just didn't want to have them think it was them as to the reason why we left. I guess somewhat it was. We felt they couldn't provide for our son.

Momma T didn't want to leave and I did... one of the many disagreements that we would face and tackle I am sure. We of course spoke of the pros and cons of both places. The biggest one was his growth as a person. While they were super nice at the old place and really loved him, we just felt like they were not going to be able to challenge him like he was already seeking. The new morning teacher at the old place couldn't even speak proper English and they watched videos during the day. Don't get me wrong... we watch tv too, but we watch educational tv for our lil guy. They had videos like Scooby Doo and other cartoons like that which we don't watch.

Momma T didn't want him to leave because she was worried about money and thought it was okay for him to stay at the old place until he was two or so. The biggest deciding factor for me was that he was already transitioning out of the baby room to a new one so why not just go ahead and make the big move. Besides he did not care for the new morning teacher that much anyway. It was kind of strange that he did not take to her. I think she tried too hard with him. Another thing that really worried us was that they would let other teachers come in and take him out of the room and parade him around the daycare to other classrooms and such. We thought we put a stop to it when we found out it occurred, but it still continued to happen.

It is pretty sad when we would come home and read his daily papers and they would say things like "He ain't ate yet" or when we would circle things on the menu for him to eat and they wouldn't feed him because if they fed him spaghetti in the baby room, they would have to feed the other kids around his same age in the baby room too. I would go in the next day and ask how he liked the spaghetti and they would say oh we didn't feed it to him because they wouldn't bring it to the room. We just started getting too many differing stories from each of the teachers there and couldn't put our finger on some things.

Momma T witnessed an older child jump on one of our lil guys' classmates because she had fallen on the floor and he started banging her head on the floor. I refused to let him transition to that room and was adamant about moving him to this other school. I kept him out a week so I could have him try out his new school. He gave me very little trouble about going there that week. He walked in and began playing with the toys and getting acquainted with the new teacher. She is super nice. The only concern I have is that the teachers he used to have were much older and grandmothers and these new teachers at the new school seem to be just out of the womb in comparison. Ha ha ha... they are very enthusiastic though and do lots of great things with the kids.

When we took him back to his old school after that week our lil guy had a problem going back. It was time to tell the old daycare of our plans and to tell them that he was not to go to the other room for as long as he is there. They did something really great for us... they let us go that day pretty much even though they normally had a two week rule. I have to say that his teacher that he would have gone to took it really personal and started to have a tremendous attitude with us.

All I can say throughout this whole process is to follow your gut at all times and if something doesn't feel right to you then it probably isn't. Never second guess yourself ever... you need to think about the welfare of your child and don't ever feel like you are being rude or a jerk. There are definitely ways to handle all situations to where you can turn an odd situation into a win-win. The old place has told us we are more than welcome to bring him back anytime if we need to for the day or whatever.

Now as far as the price goes... here comes the hard to swallow part. The old place was $135 a week... the new place is $210 a week. OUCH!!!! But hey he is our son, he is worth it and deserves the best life has to offer him. You get what you pay for!!!!

He does art and learns sign language and sleeps on a cot. He eats like a champ and loves his teachers and outside playtime. He loves it so much that he craves to go outside all the time now. He is doing so well and everyone just loves him. He certainly does make an impression wherever he goes.

I think this decision that we came to mutually and as a team has worked out and I cannot wait until we get to hang his art work at our offices and at home. I will post some of it on here!


Pop and Lock Baby Style

So we aren't saying that we have the next "So you think you can dance" winner here but you never know. Just this week he has been feeling his groove thang and shaking it (not like that folks!). It is awesome... any type of music that plays he starts bouncing up and down and shaking his little butt.  He hasn't really expressed an interest in music like that before and we've noticed other little kids dancing and just thought... Maybe its not his cup of formula. 

We have not quite figured out what style of music he likes best either, but I am sure in time that will come too. So far all he has been shaking it to is his instrumental musical toys, maybe we need to put on some Salt n' Peppa or some Black Eyed Peas and see what he does. Better yet all he needs to do is sit on our couch at 10:00 p.m. or later and listen to the thumping cars go up and down our street.

It will be interesting to see what he gravitates towards considering the amount of concerts we went to while he was in the womb and the tunes I listened to on my 3 hour commute daily. Thank goodness he wasn't shakin' it in my belly while I was pregnant too much. I would have hated to have pulled over and relieved myself on the side of the interstate.

Anyway... when he makes one of his millions of musical toys play a song he begins to get down, smiles, and looks over to see if you're dancing too.  If you are dancing he, of course, stops!  We're not quite sure if he'll have rhythm, but with a smile like his we're not sure it'll matter.  The good news is that with his new found grooviness his Elvis costume for Halloween will make more sense (we didn't spring for the wig, we thought it was creepy).   



Me and My Shadow

So you would think it would be bad enough walking around avoiding the 14 year old dog who has lost his hearing or the cats that inevitably swerve into your path to try and trip you all the while possibly breaking your neck, but now lil guy is getting into the mix!!! So the last couple of days he is our shadow... I cannot tell if the separation anxiety is kicking in or if he just isn't feeling well because his molars are coming in.

The minute he wakes up he smiles, reaches those little arms up toward the sky for you to pick him up... he lays his sweet head upon your shoulder and maybe makes a few humming sounds. So you hug and snuggle with him until the time comes you have to put him down so you can go to the restroom, take a shower or let the dog out among numerous other things.

And the waterworks turn on... and the crocodile tears form and streak down his face... my heart just breaks when he gets so upset like that. I just don't think he is himself lately and I cannot quite pinpoint why. The interesting thing is that he doesn't cry when I leave him at daycare in the mornings. It is just at home when he has these types of reactions. And it isn't a consistent thing though.

Teary and tantrum-filled goodbyes are a common part of a child's earliest years. Around the first birthday, many kids develop separation anxiety, getting upset when a parent tries to leave them with someone else.

Though separation anxiety is a perfectly normal part of childhood development, it can be unsettling.

Understanding what your child is going through and having a few coping strategies can help both of you get through it.

How Separation Anxiety Develops

Babies adapt pretty well to other care givers. Parents probably feel more anxiety about being separated than infants do! As long as their needs are being met, most babies younger than 6 months adjust easily to other people.

Sometime between 4-7 months, babies develop a sense of object permanence and begin to learn that things and people exist even when they're out of sight. This is when babies start playing the "dropsy" game — dropping things over the side of the high chair and expecting an adult to retrieve it (which, once retrieved, get dropped again!).

The same thing occurs with a parent. Babies realize that there's only mom or dad, and when they can't see you, that means you've gone away. And most don't yet yet understand the concept of time so do not know if or when you'll come back.

Whether you're in the kitchen, in the next bedroom, or at the office, it's all the same to your baby. You've disappeared, and your child will do whatever he or she can to prevent this from happening.

Stresses Can Trigger Anxiety

Between 8 months old 1 year old, kids grow into more independent toddlers, yet they are even more uncertain about being separated from a parent. This is when separation anxiety develops, and a child may become agitated and upset when parent tries to leave.

Whether you need to go into the next room for just a few seconds, leave your child with a sitter for the evening, or drop off your child at day care, your little might now react by crying, clinging to you, and resisting attention from others.

The timing of separation anxiety can vary widely from child to child. Some kids may go through it later, between 18 months and 2½ years of age. Some may never experience it. And for others, certain life stresses can trigger feelings of anxiety about being separated from a parent: a new child care situation or caregiver, a new sibling, moving to a new place, or tension at home.

How long does separation anxiety last? It varies, depending on the child and how a parent responds. In some cases, depending on a child's temperament, separation anxiety can last from infancy through the elementary school years. In cases where the separation anxiety interferes with an older child's normal activities, it can indicate a deeper anxiety disorder. If separation anxiety appears out of the blue in an older child, there might be another problem, like bullying or abuse.

Separation anxiety is different from the normal feelings older kids have when they don't want a parent to leave. In those cases, the distress can usually be overcome if a child is distracted enough, and won't re-emerge until the parent returns and the child remembers that the parent left.

And kids do understand the effect this behavior has on parents. If you come running back into the room every time your child cries and then stay there longer or cancel your plans, your child will continue to use this tactic to avoid separation.

These are the days we should cherish though, right? Because there will come a day when he goes through the stage of his parents just aren't cool... :-) It is just difficult to see him so upset, but it is a learning stage for him and he needs to go through this. Let's just hope he grows out of it... I know he will.

He is such a joy to have around... we are blessed to have him!

It was really great... so last night we had a friend over and he walked over to her and got up in her arms and snuggled with her while we all watched Kung Foo Panda... there were actual times where he giggled and laughed at things that were going on on the TV. This was a first for him...


My Heart Aches

My thoughts and prayers are with my ancestors and relatives in Indonesia. I hope all are safe. During my travels to the wonderful country of Indonesia, I learned a great deal about how gracious they are. Many folks I met there would give you the shirt off of their back if you were in need. I was very struck by their kindness and generosity even in times of turmoil.

I would love to go back and visit my relatives and spend time once more in the beautiful country. It seems like a lifetime ago when I was there, but at the same time it seems like it was just yesterday. I wish there was something I could do from half way around the world. Perhaps there is...


Say What!?

So lil guy has been walking around like a drunken sailor the past day or so. I cannot decide if it is the new shoes on his feet or an issue with his ear. Well thank you very much mom's intuition!!! It is an ear infection, not just in one ear but both. Poor little guy.

I saw him tugging on his ear a few days ago, but thought it was just him teething again and then came the crying when I would lay him on the bed to change his clothes or his diaper. I started using common sense and connecting the dots. The only thing that was odd was that he was still able to drink his bottles alright and eat just like before. The stumbling when he was walking was the final piece to the puzzle as was the teachers at his day care asking what is wrong with our lil guy... he just wasn't his happy go-lucky self.

The doc yesterday said that we did everything they would have had us do too if we had brought him in earlier. He had some congestion and a stuffy nose, so we had been giving him a cough medicine with a decongestant and running his humidifier while he slept. That was reassuring to us to say the least. She gave us some drops for his ears to ease the pain and some antibotics to clear up the infection.

He sure is a tough kid though... the only time he woke up screaming was last night and the minute we put the drops in, he eased himself right back to sleep. We caught it and took him to the doctor just in time. Who says moms intuition doesn't pay off. I thought this excerpt from WebMD was dead on - so I thought I would share it with other moms out there who might need to know what the symptoms look like.

Thank you WebMD...

Ear Infections - Symptoms

Symptoms of a middle ear infection(acute otitis media) often start 2 to 7 days after a cold or other upper respiratory infection. Symptoms of an ear infection may include:

  • Ear pain (mild to severe). Babies often pull or tug at their ears when they have an earache.
  • Fever.
  • Drainage from the ear that is thick and yellow or bloody. If this occurs, the eardrum has probably burst (ruptured). The hole in the eardrum often heals by itself in a few weeks.
  • Loss of appetite, vomiting, and grumpy behavior.
  • Trouble sleeping.
  • Trouble hearing.

Symptoms of fluid buildup may include:

  • Popping, ringing, or a feeling of fullness or pressure in the ear. Children often have trouble describing this feeling. Children may rub their ears trying to relieve pressure.
  • Trouble hearing. Children who have problems hearing may seem dreamy or inattentive, or they may appear grumpy or cranky.
  • Balance problems and dizziness.

Some children don't have any symptoms with this condition.